Event of the Day
Last Saturday I said goodbye to my lovely, luxurious locks and received my "mission cut." I am not particularly fond of having short hair, but alas, it was necessary. I had been growing my hair out for a while, knowing that the day of reckoning would eventually come. My one consolation was that at least it would be noticed, right? Being a guy, and being a guy who had pretty much the same hair for the last six years or so, I rarely had people comment on a hair cut. Now I don't rely on others' comments to form my self-image, but hey, it is fun to have people notice you, even if it is because you had a bad hair cut. Sadly, the "oh my gosh!" reaction I hoped for never really came to be. The funny thing is that most of my closest friends were apathetic, while some people I barely know have provided the reaction I yearned for. One such reaction - and subsequent hilarity - took place in my student success class. My student success professor, who I'm not particularly fond of, interrupted the middle of class, saying, "Wow! You cut your hair!" My zinger of an answer, "Yep." Followed by, "Wow, do you feel naked without it?" I answered, truthfully and reluctantly, "Yeah, a little bit." My feelings after what happened next could have followed a myriad of paths: Shock, Horror, Disgust, Embarrassment, to name a few. Surprisingly enough, I just thought it was funny. After admitting with a resigned tone that I felt naked without my hair, the Tongan girl in front of me exclaimed proudly to the class, "Well I think he looks good naked!" Cue awkward, incredulous silence. Then...laughter filled the classroom. You can't write it any better.
Tip of the Hat/Wag of the Finger
The tip of my illustrious hat goes to the Utah Jazz. The future was beginning to look bleak when a struggling Jazz team found out that they would loose top scorer and rebounder Carlos Boozer for 4-5 weeks due to injury. The Jazz have responded by going 5-1 since Boozer went out, thanks in large part to the improved play of Deron Williams, Derek Fisher, Paul Millsap, and incredible clutchiness of Mehmet Okur. I will be attending the Jazz game against the Cleveland Cavaliers on February 14th, hoping they can improve that record to 6-1. Ordinarily, I might be sad that I was yet again Valentineless for Valentine's day, but I've got a hot date with a hot team and I refuse to let that get me down. By the way, the wag of my finger of course, goes to Valentine's Day, or as many heartbroken souls call it, Single Awareness Day, S.A.D. Why set up a holiday where everyone loses? Guys with a Valentine invariably screw it up, and are sent to the dog house. Girls with a Valentine are heartbroken when the guys invariably screw up. Everyone without a Valentine is reminded of how pathetic they are because they don't get a chance to either screw up or be screwed. Wow, thanks St. Valentine of 269 A.D. I know you were probably upset that you were going to be executed for your Christian beliefs by the Romans on February 14th, but that doesn't mean you had to ruin the day for future generations.
That Other Gender
Recently a suave friend of mine has been giving me pointers on dealing with that other gender, and despite his track record of success I am still having a hard time. The past year has been a revelation of the subtlety, deception, and complete idiocy that is interaction between male and female. Having my first text conversation with a girl, my friend guided me on what to type in. Every time he told me to type, I gave him a "What!?!??" face, and he told me to trust him. It seems that flirting is some delicate and inexplicable balance between showing that they are the only thing you want, but you could easily live without them. That they are fantastic, but entirely ordinary. Flirting is a constant interplay between complimenting and teasing, giving and taking. How can something that is so fundamental to human relationships be so hard to understand? Anyway thanks to my friend, the conversation did seem to be constructive. Now he has given me an ultimatum to "get her" (still not entirely sure what that means) within two weeks or I have to move on to a new girl. This "player" or "lady-killer" style is completely foreign to me. It feels uncomfortable, but considering that my previous attempts at being friendly, nice, and a bit shy were all failures, a change up might be worth a shot.
Tuesday, February 13, 2007
Tuesday, February 6, 2007
Day Five - Basically I'm starting to like blogging
Event of the Day
Today, I delved into a few blogs, including one that I posted on, about my summer job working construction. I've always been somewhat critical of blogs and journals in general. Despite the fact that I love history, and have a dysfunctional memory, I always thought they seemed pointless. I hereby retract any disparaging comment or thought I've had about journal writing. Looking back at the events that transpired last summer, I felt the proverbial flood of nostalgia overtaking me. I've been down lately, and reading over the funny things that happened while we worked brightened my day a bit. I never thought a look back to 60 hour work weeks, monotonous work, and foul-mouthed fellow employees would give my spirits a lift. Congratulations Universe, you win. In turn, I am more excited about posting here than I was before. Even though I might have never have hundreds of readers - like I dreamed about when I started this blog - I know I will always have at least one reader. . . me.
The Index
Here is a fantabulous section where I will assign five different things a rating of 1-10. 10 is good, and 1 is bad. Comprende? Okay then, let's get it started.
Let's get it started - 9
I still love this song, but other rap songs have surfaced that I like even more, so this Black Eyed Peas popular single falls to 9.
Fun-size sour punch straws - 1
I spent ten minutes trying to open the package to one of these earlier today, and ended up with 10 times less energy then the minuscule packet of mono saccharides would have given me in the first place.
The Office - 8
What?!? The Office falls to 8? I know it seems harsh, but at a time when I needed a freaking good episode filled with hope of a Jim/Pam get together, I was instead given more delay. No worries, however, I trust the Office writers to set things straight.
Ugly couples - 5
I really am torn on this. On one hand, it is good to see people happily together, and it means that I don't have to worry about talking to either of them. On the other hand, they still kind of make you sick inside, and it simply reminds me how pathetic it is that I've never had a girlfriend.
The Jazz - 10
The Utah Jazz lose Carlos Boozer, then come up with three close wins against upper-tier teams? They must know that I'm a little down. Thanks guys, this really means a lot to me.
That Other Gender
I have to be the worst failure ever at closing the deal. I'm disgusted with myself, really. I will present to you three examples among the zounds of failures I've had. Most recently, I was walking out the door after work, and saw two really cute girls in a jeep. I made eye contact and smiled and walked on towards my car, thinking nothing of the event. As I sat in my car talking on the cell phone, another girl walked out of my workplace and started talking to the girls in the jeep. That same girl kept looking over at my car. Coincidence? I think not. Problem was, what do you really do in that situation. Get out of the car and get a-flirtin'? I decided to just start driving to my friends house. Then they started following me in their jeep. Did I try and do something like lose them, or go really fast, or fall back and open my window? Nope, I just kept driving until they lost interest and turned around.
Now here is an egregious one. I decided to attend my friends' institute class, and there was an exceptionally attractive girl across the room. I had read something about making eye contact on the Internet and I decided to try it out. Lo and behold, my magic was working and I caught her eye. It was a solid 2-3 seconds of looking and she smiled. I also caught her glancing over a few times later in the class period. After the class, we both lingered and I told her she was devastatingly beautiful and we started making out. Sorry, wanted to see if you were still reading. Actually, she left before me, but she kind of walked slow until we were pretty much walking next to each other. I still cringe when I think of what happened next, which was nothing. I didn't say anything. I kind of smiled a bit, and spend a minute or so wondering what to say, until she broke off a different way, and I just sat down on a chair and cursed myself.
There is a couple girls that I've caught glancing my way the last few times I've gone to my Biology class, and I don't know if anything will come of it. The glances are obvious, but obviously I don't know what to do afterwards. Maybe I'm overrating eye contact? I don't think so, but regardless I'm horrible at starting a conversation with girls. Many people have told me that it doesn't even really matter what you say, but my mind still overworks itself trying to think of something incredibly suave to say. Feel free to comment on how cowardly I am and stuff.
Today, I delved into a few blogs, including one that I posted on, about my summer job working construction. I've always been somewhat critical of blogs and journals in general. Despite the fact that I love history, and have a dysfunctional memory, I always thought they seemed pointless. I hereby retract any disparaging comment or thought I've had about journal writing. Looking back at the events that transpired last summer, I felt the proverbial flood of nostalgia overtaking me. I've been down lately, and reading over the funny things that happened while we worked brightened my day a bit. I never thought a look back to 60 hour work weeks, monotonous work, and foul-mouthed fellow employees would give my spirits a lift. Congratulations Universe, you win. In turn, I am more excited about posting here than I was before. Even though I might have never have hundreds of readers - like I dreamed about when I started this blog - I know I will always have at least one reader. . . me.
The Index
Here is a fantabulous section where I will assign five different things a rating of 1-10. 10 is good, and 1 is bad. Comprende? Okay then, let's get it started.
Let's get it started - 9
I still love this song, but other rap songs have surfaced that I like even more, so this Black Eyed Peas popular single falls to 9.
Fun-size sour punch straws - 1
I spent ten minutes trying to open the package to one of these earlier today, and ended up with 10 times less energy then the minuscule packet of mono saccharides would have given me in the first place.
The Office - 8
What?!? The Office falls to 8? I know it seems harsh, but at a time when I needed a freaking good episode filled with hope of a Jim/Pam get together, I was instead given more delay. No worries, however, I trust the Office writers to set things straight.
Ugly couples - 5
I really am torn on this. On one hand, it is good to see people happily together, and it means that I don't have to worry about talking to either of them. On the other hand, they still kind of make you sick inside, and it simply reminds me how pathetic it is that I've never had a girlfriend.
The Jazz - 10
The Utah Jazz lose Carlos Boozer, then come up with three close wins against upper-tier teams? They must know that I'm a little down. Thanks guys, this really means a lot to me.
That Other Gender
I have to be the worst failure ever at closing the deal. I'm disgusted with myself, really. I will present to you three examples among the zounds of failures I've had. Most recently, I was walking out the door after work, and saw two really cute girls in a jeep. I made eye contact and smiled and walked on towards my car, thinking nothing of the event. As I sat in my car talking on the cell phone, another girl walked out of my workplace and started talking to the girls in the jeep. That same girl kept looking over at my car. Coincidence? I think not. Problem was, what do you really do in that situation. Get out of the car and get a-flirtin'? I decided to just start driving to my friends house. Then they started following me in their jeep. Did I try and do something like lose them, or go really fast, or fall back and open my window? Nope, I just kept driving until they lost interest and turned around.
Now here is an egregious one. I decided to attend my friends' institute class, and there was an exceptionally attractive girl across the room. I had read something about making eye contact on the Internet and I decided to try it out. Lo and behold, my magic was working and I caught her eye. It was a solid 2-3 seconds of looking and she smiled. I also caught her glancing over a few times later in the class period. After the class, we both lingered and I told her she was devastatingly beautiful and we started making out. Sorry, wanted to see if you were still reading. Actually, she left before me, but she kind of walked slow until we were pretty much walking next to each other. I still cringe when I think of what happened next, which was nothing. I didn't say anything. I kind of smiled a bit, and spend a minute or so wondering what to say, until she broke off a different way, and I just sat down on a chair and cursed myself.
There is a couple girls that I've caught glancing my way the last few times I've gone to my Biology class, and I don't know if anything will come of it. The glances are obvious, but obviously I don't know what to do afterwards. Maybe I'm overrating eye contact? I don't think so, but regardless I'm horrible at starting a conversation with girls. Many people have told me that it doesn't even really matter what you say, but my mind still overworks itself trying to think of something incredibly suave to say. Feel free to comment on how cowardly I am and stuff.
Monday, February 5, 2007
Day Four - Good college
Event of the Day
Most of my life is spent in what I call bad college, where homework and boredom dwell. Occasionally, however, I am reminded that every once in a while, good college comes around the corner. Usually good college only lasts a minute or two, and then bad college yet again rears its ugly head. It is these all too brief moments of good college that keep me going. Today was rife (definitely one of my favorite words) with good college experiences. One of my favorite parts about college is that teachers hold less power. Up through high school, if a teacher directly told you to do something you did it, or else you were labeled as a rebel. Today, two people stood up to the teacher, and it made me laugh. First, there was a guy in my biology class who decided to leave a few minutes early. The professor caught him and told him to just wait a minute. The second the professor turned away, he proceeded to walk out the door. When my professor turned around to find the student gone, his flabbergasted (also one of my favorite words) look made me chuckle for a while. In my next class - an arduously boring student success class - the teacher was poking fun at a comment a girl in the back of the class made. How often have you forced yourself to laugh along, when you'd rather retaliate at the person that's making you out to be an idiot? Well, the girl replied, "Yeah, freak you." I'm not sure what's funnier, the fact that she retaliated, or that she actually used "freak." Now, I don't condone being a jerk to your professor, but it is refreshing to see normal people - meaning not that guy who always smelled like drugs and wore a bandanna, and you'd never talk to him because he'd give you that "why the crap are you talking to me?" look when you'd try - not take a professor's crap because they're tired of it. I certainly wish I would have had the nerve to do that a few times. By the way, the other good college moments of the day included talking to my friend Michelle, catching two girls looking at me (hopefully it's because I'm hot, and not because I had something in my teeth or something) during Biology, and making a pretty keen joke in my student success class.
Tip of the Hat/ Wag of the Finger
My tip of the hat goes to Cinnamon Life cereal. I think Life is a very unique cereal, just like cereal is a unique part of life. It doesn't really float, it just kind of hovers near the surface, providing brief glimpses of the sugary, wholegrain squares lurking below. It also kind of breaks apart really easy, and isn't very crunchy. For a long time, I am sorry to say I let Life's differences get in the way of me eating it. A couple days ago, I decided to give Life a chance. I had a bowl of Cinnamon Life, and realized that my past prejudice had kept me from a life of true breakfast fullfillment. I look forward to a life full of Life for now on. My wag of the finger goes to the guy who was wearing the same jacket as me today. I know I have style, but this is just ridiculous. I have one - one! - jacket that makes me feel like I'm cool, and he stole that part of me today. The only thing that helped me get through this catastrophic event, was the fact that he was wearing it fully zipped up, while I kind of had the 1/2 zip thing going.
That Other Gender
Last week, I explained the ambiguity of rating systems in this segment, but today I look at something that everyone can agree on, the Celebrity Top Five. Without further adeiu, here are the lovely ladies:
5. Scarlett Johansson - Her prestige goes without saying
4. Jennifer Anniston - I actually don't know why I like her so much, but she is attractive
3. Natalie Portman - hot AND in Star Wars, 'nuff said
2. Reese Witherspoon - great looks, and I always fall a little in love with any character she plays
1. Jessica Alba - I actually haven't seen a whole movie with her in it, but for goodness' sakes, she makes me want to see Into the Blue, and I don't even know what it's about!
In case any of these women compose part of my readership - just leave a comment, and we can go out to a movie (maybe one that you're in???) and have dinner sometime. Call me.
Most of my life is spent in what I call bad college, where homework and boredom dwell. Occasionally, however, I am reminded that every once in a while, good college comes around the corner. Usually good college only lasts a minute or two, and then bad college yet again rears its ugly head. It is these all too brief moments of good college that keep me going. Today was rife (definitely one of my favorite words) with good college experiences. One of my favorite parts about college is that teachers hold less power. Up through high school, if a teacher directly told you to do something you did it, or else you were labeled as a rebel. Today, two people stood up to the teacher, and it made me laugh. First, there was a guy in my biology class who decided to leave a few minutes early. The professor caught him and told him to just wait a minute. The second the professor turned away, he proceeded to walk out the door. When my professor turned around to find the student gone, his flabbergasted (also one of my favorite words) look made me chuckle for a while. In my next class - an arduously boring student success class - the teacher was poking fun at a comment a girl in the back of the class made. How often have you forced yourself to laugh along, when you'd rather retaliate at the person that's making you out to be an idiot? Well, the girl replied, "Yeah, freak you." I'm not sure what's funnier, the fact that she retaliated, or that she actually used "freak." Now, I don't condone being a jerk to your professor, but it is refreshing to see normal people - meaning not that guy who always smelled like drugs and wore a bandanna, and you'd never talk to him because he'd give you that "why the crap are you talking to me?" look when you'd try - not take a professor's crap because they're tired of it. I certainly wish I would have had the nerve to do that a few times. By the way, the other good college moments of the day included talking to my friend Michelle, catching two girls looking at me (hopefully it's because I'm hot, and not because I had something in my teeth or something) during Biology, and making a pretty keen joke in my student success class.
Tip of the Hat/ Wag of the Finger
My tip of the hat goes to Cinnamon Life cereal. I think Life is a very unique cereal, just like cereal is a unique part of life. It doesn't really float, it just kind of hovers near the surface, providing brief glimpses of the sugary, wholegrain squares lurking below. It also kind of breaks apart really easy, and isn't very crunchy. For a long time, I am sorry to say I let Life's differences get in the way of me eating it. A couple days ago, I decided to give Life a chance. I had a bowl of Cinnamon Life, and realized that my past prejudice had kept me from a life of true breakfast fullfillment. I look forward to a life full of Life for now on. My wag of the finger goes to the guy who was wearing the same jacket as me today. I know I have style, but this is just ridiculous. I have one - one! - jacket that makes me feel like I'm cool, and he stole that part of me today. The only thing that helped me get through this catastrophic event, was the fact that he was wearing it fully zipped up, while I kind of had the 1/2 zip thing going.
That Other Gender
Last week, I explained the ambiguity of rating systems in this segment, but today I look at something that everyone can agree on, the Celebrity Top Five. Without further adeiu, here are the lovely ladies:
5. Scarlett Johansson - Her prestige goes without saying
4. Jennifer Anniston - I actually don't know why I like her so much, but she is attractive
3. Natalie Portman - hot AND in Star Wars, 'nuff said
2. Reese Witherspoon - great looks, and I always fall a little in love with any character she plays
1. Jessica Alba - I actually haven't seen a whole movie with her in it, but for goodness' sakes, she makes me want to see Into the Blue, and I don't even know what it's about!
In case any of these women compose part of my readership - just leave a comment, and we can go out to a movie (maybe one that you're in???) and have dinner sometime. Call me.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)